It seems as though I have an opinion about almost everything. I would venture to guess that not everyone always agrees with me or sees the world the way I do, and I accept that. I believe myself to be open-minded and accepting, so try not to bury me in the ground after this unloading of information that tends to keep me awake at night :)
1.) I believe in medical intervention. (insert duh here, if you must :) Clearly 3 of my 5 kids have received a surgical procedure which enabled them to use a sense that they were not born with the ability to use). Cochlear implants are not accepted by everyone and they don't need to be in order for me to feel like this medical, ground breaking, "new", evolving procedure was well worth the risk. My opinion :)
2.) Minimum wage increase. Sure, why not raise the federal minimum wage in an attempt to help people make a better life for themselves. Seems clean, cut and dry to not pay people such low wages that they struggle to make a life for themselves. But you know what else makes sense to me? Working hard and making a life for yourself outside of minimum wage. I work in the fast food industry, a place where people in the public have a general consensus that we don't get paid much outside of minimum wage. The fast food strikes and demands for $15/hour always make me chuckle. For starters, I will say that the company that I work for, usually recognizes and rewards talent when they see it. We do this thing where... if you are a good worker, show up and are reliable --- we pay you more money because we think you are VALUABLE!!! :). It's innovative and great, even inside a fast food joint!! However, this day and age it seems as the years pass especially, finding people that do what they say they are going to do is getting harder and harder. So instead of rewarding people for performance, the government is going to reward them for lack there of. The only people making minimum wage in the establishments I work, are 14 or 15 year old kids. My apologies if the place you work does not have performance reviews or raises, or start you out above the federal minimum wage. My advice, don't work for the slippery suckers out there that only want to pay you minimum wage. I have no doubts that places like that exist. Shame on them. Do better for yourself. Show up and be amazing, my experience tells me that it always pays off. Again, this is my opinion :)
3.) Church. Having a love-hate relationship with what was once a very close family to me. I've been driven out the door by a divided body of people who can't seem to find peace and a place in their hearts to agree to disagree. I have an opinion. A very strong opinion. I believe that where there is people, there will be conflict. I believe that conflict can either stretch us to see past where we can stretch our hand out, or it can eat us up and destroy us. I whole-heartedly believe in growing the body of believers here on Earth and using resources and tools and people and all other AWESOME means that God makes available to us. I found strength and started a relationship with the Lord in a building full of people. The church. What an amazing feeling it is to be a part of something where you all share such a passion. A passion for Jesus, and the belief that He carries all of our sins. That God sent his son in an act of merciful love for all of us. I don't know for sure the day that all of that changed. I can recall when my life changed and I can recall when I started to feel my church family slip away. Currently, my time in the Word has slipped, my prayer life has weakened and my time spent in fellowship has pretty well bottomed out. I can place all the blame in world on one thing or another, but in my heart I know it's the enemy. I'm full blown aware of this so now I have to decide what to do and how to move forward? My prayer would be that I could see some resolve in the place where I surrendered my life to the Lord. I pray that we could all move on to a place where we build eachother up, don't need to raise our voices at one another, can chose to agree or lovingly disagree, speak with honesty and integrity, accept and LOVE one another and ALL OTHERS, and go back to growing the kingdom. Whether it be through the youth, infants, adults or any in-between. My way is not the only way. Practice saying it with me: My way, is not the only way. Yes. I feel much better now.
4.) Have a couple kids, no kids or lots of kids. Whatever it is, I think thats just great! :) Can we just accept that, once again, our way is not the only way? Hey guess what, I have 5 kids and all but one have special needs and guess what??? I think my family is GREAT! I don't think everyone needs to have a lot of kids, but I have several young children and I happen to do a pretty great job raising each one of them :)! Each of them are loved, cared for, fed and bathed. Yep, all 5 of them are mine. Like it or love it, those are your options because they are all here in my life for a reason!
5.) Homeschool, unschool, public school, Christian school. Whatever, whichever, I happen to be completely satisfied with my experience this far with the public school system. My oldest is thriving academically and I couldn't be more pleased with the teachers I have had the pleasure of getting to know. I enjoy volunteering in class rooms, attending bike rodeos, volunteering to read at story time or surprising my kids at lunch time. I appreciate the efforts of my school. I'm proud of all that gets accomplished in those doors, socially, emotionally and academically. But guess what? I know that my way, is not the only way! I have no problem with the choice to homeschool. I think its great what you can accomplish before noon, or that you can do school on Saturday instead of Tuesday. I LOVE the flexibility, the ideas of doing nature walks and growing at your families pace. I think its fantastic!! The Christian school incorporating bible time right into your day, genius. Awesome way to start it out in the early years and build up those building blocks strong and tall. LOVE a sturdy foundation. I just think keeping an open mind is generally the more loving thing to do. Like I said before, my way, is not the ONLY way.
So what do we do when we find ourselves in a situation where our way is not the way the tide is going? How do we respond? Is there something wrong with fighting for what we believe? My not-so-educated-initial-response is: NO. There is probably nothing wrong with voicing your opinion. The point where I think it gets really dicey is when we get to the point of frustration. We lose all ability to be open minded and we start closing the doors. We can stand true to our beliefs and still be open minded. Often times, if we can admit that our way is not the ONLY way -- we can even grow ourselves into more mature and seasoned individuals. Huffy-puffy arguing, rolled eyes, nasty/closed off body language, quick rebuttals and hasty remarks are some of the first signs that our opinions and our ideas are sewn onto our person. I know all of that from experience.. I can be the queen of huffy-puffy. Not proud, just honest. Go ahead, have an opinion. Please, have an opinion and feel free to take a stand. However, be mature enough to be willing to rip it off if you change your mind. I get in positions sometimes, and have with all 5 of the above mentioned topics where I feel attacked. I want people to see it as I do. I still do to this day. However, I've taken some time to sit back in each of these situations and think to myself, where are they coming from when they say XYZ. What do I do when I feel the discussion turning into an argument and the heat getting turned on? Keep an open mind always and remember:
Proverbs 15:1
A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh words stirs up anger.
Tuesday, May 26, 2015
Tuesday, May 12, 2015
If Confidence is the Key to Success, Humility must be a super power.
Where has the time gone? My twins are 18 months old!!!!!! My oldest is just shy of turning 8 and wrapping up his 2nd grade school year. Kendra is going to be a kindergartener!! Good gravy, who knew this would ever happen?? Who knew that I wouldn't still be surviving off of 4-6 hours of sleep every night?? I didn't think Aubree was ever going to get those cochlear implants and now she is saying words!!! Who knew that Baylee would turn into a little jokester just like her daddy, making it more of a 50/50 split on her attitude -- straight up diva or lovable little trickster. Can't forget about my sweet little Milesy, he has turned the corner towards a very outspoken and super smart boy. He has not lost his sensitivity (yes, he loves barbies and enjoys watching my little pony videos on youtube-- I happen to adore his individuality). They are all thriving in their own areas. Each of my kids is VERY much different from the one before them. I just could never have guessed it a year ago. One year ago, I was sliding down a slippery slope. I was not sure what I was doing wrong, but certainly (I thought), my littles needed me to step up my mama game. If you can't remember, let me paint the picture.....
When Noah finished first grade, I was elated to have him done. He excelled academically but struggled socially and it BROKE MY HEART!! Last year, I would get so emotional thinking about how he didn't really have the confidence to ask to play with people and then of course, I wondered if people shunned him because of his ears. Of course, his ears had to be the problem because he was an amazing boy!!! (clearly, that last sentence was my maternal brilliance kicking in-- had to blame something, and it certainly couldn't be my perfect boy). A year ago, my sweet, 4 year old Kendra was pretty much the opposite of her big brother. She had confidence, could make friends with a simple little flash of her dimples and instead, struggled with her ABC's and 123's. She didn't love to read like her brother did (so surely, I had done something wrong!! If she enjoyed stories, SURELY she would have picked up on language and learning just as her big brother. Man, I was a failure). Miles was still in the repeating phase last year. Twelve months ago, I was already predicting that Miles would not be ready for kindergarten (2 years out at the time), because I was failing him. I wasn't sure what I was doing wrong, but there was something that I was missing because Noah was a genius academically, Kendra was sub-par and Miles was merely repeating what I was saying-- did he lack the ability to comprehend?? I didn't know, and webMD and google didn't have the answer either. I was up a creek without a paddle. A failure. A year ago, we didn't know if Aubree was hearing us or not. It seemed like it would come and go and good grief, with all the sleep we were getting, how reliable were we at reporting how well she was or wasn't doing?? Ummmm..... pressure!! I'd stuffed myself in a pressure cooker and I don't know how I didn't blow. A year ago, Matt started his journey in the Marshall store. He tagged on 2.5ish hours of travel each day. It is REALLY hard to have your husband that far away when your a soldier in the trenches. A year ago, Baylee cried and cried and cried some more.
But look at me now! I'm a survivor!!! :)
It has been a while, and probably too long since I've taken some time to sit down and feel it all out. Truth is, a lot of times its just easier to try to forget that you feel or how you feel. Especially when your trying to be strong, stand tall in your faith, and be thankful for the yesterdays and hopeful for the tomorrows. I guess that is pretty much the reason I haven't taken too many time outs to write like I used to faithfully. I had a once a month rule, no more, no less for the first year that I blogged. I have about a zillion unpublished blogs and only about 20ish (?) that I've confidently hit "publish" on. I'm a fairly happy gal, really, I am. Somedays, I feel like all signs point towards the fact that I don't have to chose happy, but I still make a pretty good effort at it. My quality of life is highly dependent on the choices that I make. The reason I'm writing this blog is simple.... If confidence is key to success, than humility must be a super power. Let me humble myself before you all today.
People, people, people. I'm only 27 years young, so I will be the first to admit that I have a lot to learn in life. You've probably heard the term, hindsight is 20/20? True story! I still have to figure out how to step into the present situation that I am in and recognize the beauty. I've mastered looking back and realizing that ohhhh.... all this lead me to that, which helped us achieve this and accomplish all of THAT! My thought process doesn't always lean in a positive direction. I'm more of a "what more could/should I have done" type of girl. That is what I am trying to make a conscious decision at changing. I'm sure I will have a relapse or 10, dwelling on the not-so-positive, but hey I'm human. I'm a humble human. Being a humble human makes me AmAzInG!!! Why, you ask?? Because I'm not done growing. I won't allow it!! I will continue to become a better version of myself! BOOM! That's what's up! (okay, totally just sounded like my quirky husband right there)...
And for the highlight reel................
Kendra just participated in her first dance class, complete with a dance recital that consisted of 3 different dance routines. NAILED it! During the recital, my worst fear happened.. Kendras CI processor fell off her head during one of her spins. It flew behind her, within the stomping ground of one of her many fellow dancers. I gasped in the audience, feeling helpless and wanting to cover my eyes like I would during one of the suspenseful moments while watching the Black List. She noticed immediately, her eyes tracked it and she turned around and grabbed her CI and placed it right back on her head and recovered like a CHAMPION! Yea, I am still pretty proud.
Noah has leaps and bounds grown socially over the course of this past year. He plays with the neighborhood kids, when I go to the school to hang out for a bit, people are always interacting with him and he has developed quite the personality. He reminds me of his dad, doesn't let too much bother him and knows how to be the life of the party. School still comes pretty easy for him, except for the fact that he doesn't write as nicely as his 5 year old sister. HAHA, but hey. We had 5 kids hoping one would be a doctor :)
I have the best conversations with Miles. He truly is such a sweet boy!!! He's the type of kid who will come home and recognize that I've done my hair (I've got 5 kids, no way am I maintaining a beautiful head of hair). But he notices!! He is appreciative, thankful, helpful and kind. He talks a TON!! While not all of what he says is understandable... he is so on the right track.
Aubree has words!!! Which certainly means her CI's are WORKING!!! I will be 100% honest. She did not respond reliably when her name was called for the first 2 months of wearing her CI's. January and February were rough.... I was not confident (imagine that-- worry wart mama over here). When all of a sudden... after months of talking and talking and trying soooo hard to keep her "ears" on. I would sing EVERYDAY, nursery rhymes with actions-- specifically itsy bitsy spider and patty-cake. One day, I was singing itsy bitsy with NO actions cues and wah-lah! She started bobbing from side to side and doing the actions ALL BY HERSELF! Now, she makes lots of sounds and she knows her name!!!! :) :). Tears, you guys. It was such a long road. She's doing so great, I never could have imagined my heart could be this happy. This time its happy tears, and I couldn't be more grateful.
Baylee has turned into quite the lover. She cuddles and kisses now. Huge upgrade from the little girl who had lots and lots of tears that were quite unexplicable for a LONG time. She sings songs, has a huge vocabulary and did I mention that she is quirky?? Her giggle is possibly the most contagious sound ever. The twins are routinely napping from noon-2:30-3, and sleeping through the night. A year ago, I would not have imagined life could be this good.
We still have our rougher moments. Even on a daily basis, whether it be CI hunting, someone got an ouchie rough housing, someone at school told me my ears are funny, etc.. etc.. But there are beautiful lessons to be learned with each situation that were faced with. The last year was a beautiful, lesson filled year. I'm confident that this year will be the same!
When Noah finished first grade, I was elated to have him done. He excelled academically but struggled socially and it BROKE MY HEART!! Last year, I would get so emotional thinking about how he didn't really have the confidence to ask to play with people and then of course, I wondered if people shunned him because of his ears. Of course, his ears had to be the problem because he was an amazing boy!!! (clearly, that last sentence was my maternal brilliance kicking in-- had to blame something, and it certainly couldn't be my perfect boy). A year ago, my sweet, 4 year old Kendra was pretty much the opposite of her big brother. She had confidence, could make friends with a simple little flash of her dimples and instead, struggled with her ABC's and 123's. She didn't love to read like her brother did (so surely, I had done something wrong!! If she enjoyed stories, SURELY she would have picked up on language and learning just as her big brother. Man, I was a failure). Miles was still in the repeating phase last year. Twelve months ago, I was already predicting that Miles would not be ready for kindergarten (2 years out at the time), because I was failing him. I wasn't sure what I was doing wrong, but there was something that I was missing because Noah was a genius academically, Kendra was sub-par and Miles was merely repeating what I was saying-- did he lack the ability to comprehend?? I didn't know, and webMD and google didn't have the answer either. I was up a creek without a paddle. A failure. A year ago, we didn't know if Aubree was hearing us or not. It seemed like it would come and go and good grief, with all the sleep we were getting, how reliable were we at reporting how well she was or wasn't doing?? Ummmm..... pressure!! I'd stuffed myself in a pressure cooker and I don't know how I didn't blow. A year ago, Matt started his journey in the Marshall store. He tagged on 2.5ish hours of travel each day. It is REALLY hard to have your husband that far away when your a soldier in the trenches. A year ago, Baylee cried and cried and cried some more.
But look at me now! I'm a survivor!!! :)
It has been a while, and probably too long since I've taken some time to sit down and feel it all out. Truth is, a lot of times its just easier to try to forget that you feel or how you feel. Especially when your trying to be strong, stand tall in your faith, and be thankful for the yesterdays and hopeful for the tomorrows. I guess that is pretty much the reason I haven't taken too many time outs to write like I used to faithfully. I had a once a month rule, no more, no less for the first year that I blogged. I have about a zillion unpublished blogs and only about 20ish (?) that I've confidently hit "publish" on. I'm a fairly happy gal, really, I am. Somedays, I feel like all signs point towards the fact that I don't have to chose happy, but I still make a pretty good effort at it. My quality of life is highly dependent on the choices that I make. The reason I'm writing this blog is simple.... If confidence is key to success, than humility must be a super power. Let me humble myself before you all today.
People, people, people. I'm only 27 years young, so I will be the first to admit that I have a lot to learn in life. You've probably heard the term, hindsight is 20/20? True story! I still have to figure out how to step into the present situation that I am in and recognize the beauty. I've mastered looking back and realizing that ohhhh.... all this lead me to that, which helped us achieve this and accomplish all of THAT! My thought process doesn't always lean in a positive direction. I'm more of a "what more could/should I have done" type of girl. That is what I am trying to make a conscious decision at changing. I'm sure I will have a relapse or 10, dwelling on the not-so-positive, but hey I'm human. I'm a humble human. Being a humble human makes me AmAzInG!!! Why, you ask?? Because I'm not done growing. I won't allow it!! I will continue to become a better version of myself! BOOM! That's what's up! (okay, totally just sounded like my quirky husband right there)...
And for the highlight reel................
Kendra just participated in her first dance class, complete with a dance recital that consisted of 3 different dance routines. NAILED it! During the recital, my worst fear happened.. Kendras CI processor fell off her head during one of her spins. It flew behind her, within the stomping ground of one of her many fellow dancers. I gasped in the audience, feeling helpless and wanting to cover my eyes like I would during one of the suspenseful moments while watching the Black List. She noticed immediately, her eyes tracked it and she turned around and grabbed her CI and placed it right back on her head and recovered like a CHAMPION! Yea, I am still pretty proud.
Noah has leaps and bounds grown socially over the course of this past year. He plays with the neighborhood kids, when I go to the school to hang out for a bit, people are always interacting with him and he has developed quite the personality. He reminds me of his dad, doesn't let too much bother him and knows how to be the life of the party. School still comes pretty easy for him, except for the fact that he doesn't write as nicely as his 5 year old sister. HAHA, but hey. We had 5 kids hoping one would be a doctor :)
I have the best conversations with Miles. He truly is such a sweet boy!!! He's the type of kid who will come home and recognize that I've done my hair (I've got 5 kids, no way am I maintaining a beautiful head of hair). But he notices!! He is appreciative, thankful, helpful and kind. He talks a TON!! While not all of what he says is understandable... he is so on the right track.
Aubree has words!!! Which certainly means her CI's are WORKING!!! I will be 100% honest. She did not respond reliably when her name was called for the first 2 months of wearing her CI's. January and February were rough.... I was not confident (imagine that-- worry wart mama over here). When all of a sudden... after months of talking and talking and trying soooo hard to keep her "ears" on. I would sing EVERYDAY, nursery rhymes with actions-- specifically itsy bitsy spider and patty-cake. One day, I was singing itsy bitsy with NO actions cues and wah-lah! She started bobbing from side to side and doing the actions ALL BY HERSELF! Now, she makes lots of sounds and she knows her name!!!! :) :). Tears, you guys. It was such a long road. She's doing so great, I never could have imagined my heart could be this happy. This time its happy tears, and I couldn't be more grateful.
Baylee has turned into quite the lover. She cuddles and kisses now. Huge upgrade from the little girl who had lots and lots of tears that were quite unexplicable for a LONG time. She sings songs, has a huge vocabulary and did I mention that she is quirky?? Her giggle is possibly the most contagious sound ever. The twins are routinely napping from noon-2:30-3, and sleeping through the night. A year ago, I would not have imagined life could be this good.
We still have our rougher moments. Even on a daily basis, whether it be CI hunting, someone got an ouchie rough housing, someone at school told me my ears are funny, etc.. etc.. But there are beautiful lessons to be learned with each situation that were faced with. The last year was a beautiful, lesson filled year. I'm confident that this year will be the same!
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