What a fun week! Noah and I baked a cake on Thursday afternoon for his sister Kendras 2nd birthday :) Yumm, chocolate per Noahs request. We celebrated it being her actual birth day by having a little cake and ice cream after nap, making homemade pizza and topped it off with some popcorn and cuddle time before bed. Kendra had a WONDERFUL day! While Matt was playing "Hide and Go Mystery" (Noah's version of hide and go seek, coupled with Scooby Doo mystery characters) Kendra was trying to keep up with the boys. I was rolling out pizza dough in the kitchen when I heard Kendra say "one-two-three-four!!!" WOW!! She was listening to the boys do their countdown to go 'seek' the other and she picked that up. Definitely won't forget that she first started counting on her 2nd birthday :)
Saturday, were looking forward to having the family over for some cake, food and celebration time as we do a co-birthday party for Miles and Kendra. With their birthdays being just a couple weeks apart, we figured it would be easiest on the family members that have to travel to see us.
I had the pleasure of starting my week off with a really great message at church, then I went home to prepare some meals for a friend who had a baby last week (anyone who knows me, knows I enjoy cooking and creating in the kitchen ;)) Then, another friend had a baby and I got to snuggle that little one. Next, I spent a day with my sister.. hanging out and catching up. Followed that with a magnificent (and maybe overdue) phone conversation with an awesome friend! After that, I enjoyed an extra day with my hubby (eventhough it mostly consisted of preparing for an upcoming birthday party.. just being able to enjoy my hubbys presence is a gift!). That night I was able to go to a friends house and catch up with LOTS of friends, make some new and get to know some old better. AmAzInG!!
The only thing I can think to complain about... nah, not worth it ;) Maybe that is even a blessing. My phone is broken and I get a new one!!! :) :) :)
Well, I got to thinking last night. After I got home from my MUMS bash.. which was a great time, I was thinking about how I would want people to look at our family from the outside. First of all, I welcome you all in :) What I find interesting, is the fact that few people have ever asked me about our kids and their hearing loss or cochlear implants. At the same time, I completely understand. Who knows if I'm struggling with it, denying there are any issues at all or sensitive to their differences. Last night, I had a small laugh with a couple of lovely ladies over their lack of hearing. That might seem a bit odd, but it was entirely appropriate (in my eyes). We were talking about the 3 sweeeeeet little children belonging to the host of our MUMS party, that were supposed to be trying to shut their eyes and sleep amidst the cackling, laughter and giggle outbursts that were happening just through their bedroom doors. I joked, we should have these gatherings at my house because my kids wouldn't be bothered a bit by the noise :) It's true, an advantage on life that people might not recognize!
That is the truth, and it doesn't hurt my feelings. Ask all the questions you can think of. A sweet little girl at church on Sunday.. she just turned 10. She is always very very very kind to our family and adores our little ones. She asked about Miles' hearing aids (which if you've seen before are pretty small). She was wondering if he would have to get a cochlear implant and I just told her the truth. I said, not as of now because his hearing is better than his brother and sisters. She just smiled and said, "Thats okay if he can't hear too good, he is perfect just the way God made him". That sweet, sweet girl hit it right on the nose. At just 10 years old, she has had one of the most in depth conversations, regarding the kids' hearing loss, anyone has attempted with me in a long time!
If I'm being honest, when I start to feel bad about their hearing loss it usually stems around the fact that it's a genetic issue. Typically, I don't go to that ugly place of blame on myself. I look at Noah and I see a very sociable, smart, thriving individual. It's hard to feel bad for him at this point, because he has no delay as far as his speech and academic abilities go. When I think about Kendra, while she is still catching up.. considering her hearing age is 12 months and she recently counted to 4 and has expanded her vocabulary to around 50 words -- How can I feel bad about that? Miles who is approaching 12 months old is reaching a lot of his developmental milestones and language is coming! He does babble and say mama, dada and baba.. which is something that none of my other kids could murmur at 11 months old! Sometimes, I think I just need a swift kick and a reminder.. maybe even a pat on the back! I need to reject feelings of discouragement and rejoice in the fact that I GOT HERE!! My kids are on track and feeling the love!! Not to toot my own horn, but the language that has been acquired by my children is not the result of a couple sessions of hearing therapy! While I love the opportunity to get more ideas on how to find those breakthroughs, I'm still the one who is putting the time and energy into my kids development at this point. Which reminds me, why would I want to blame myself because of 'my genetic' issues that I have placed upon my children. Because.... I'm basically amazing right?? Haha, well I won't go that far ;)
I have the GREAT joy of being able to connect with other families that are experiencing the same facts that I had when Noah came out of a failed newborn hearing screening. A lot of times I get asked questions and I know they are coming from a place where I have been.. hurt, disbelief and blame. A mom asked me once, how do I know that cochlear implant is the right decision? How do I know my child won't hate me later for doing this. That is a question that I asked myself! There is still a chance that my kids will decide later in life that they don't want to use a hearing device. What I know though, for right now, is that my kids laugh, sing along and dance to music. They adore their grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins and have no strains on their relationships or language barriers. And this might be selfish, but when Noah says "Mommy, I love you, your my best friend" my whole world shines!! When Kendra hears someone laugh and mimics it until it turns into a down right giggle fit, my world shines again!! And when Miles turns to me and smiles upon his name being called.. my WHOLE WORLD SHINES!! Praise GOD!!
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